Dear Wounded Heart – Abandonment Issues

Because of childhood abuse, I developed abandonment issues. In my youth, I did not like to be left alone and was clingy. Being clingy created a young adult that not only developed but held on to bad relationships. As a young lady, remaining in a terrible relationship was easier than losing someone. Now, in my healing phase, I realize some people are seasonal.

The inappropriate relationships were lessons. The good ones were impartation. And all experiences are used to build my character. So, I move forward with my hello and goodbye using the same energy. Because whatever happens in a relationship, I will benefit.

Sincerely,

Healing

Dear Wounded Heart- Embracing Our Truth

 

Dear Wounded Heart,

Sometimes we lie to ourselves and others. I know it seems harsh, but it is the truth. Our past lives may have put us in a self-protective mode. This mode causes us to imagine a better life and lie about our current conditions. I understand. I am not judging, because I lived an existence survived by fantasy and lies. The truth was too painful to share.

Many people can identify with childhood fantasy but may not understand the depth of a wounded heart’s lies. We told protective agencies lies about living conditions. There were lies told to friends and teachers about scars on our bodies. And we pretended that our home was a safe place, knowing it was not. But I get it. We can embrace fantasy and tell the lies of our youth well into our adult life.

It was easy to pull off as a child, but adult lies are offensive. And offended adults will challenge you with the truth. I understand this as well. But there is a solution to this issue. So, today is a new day. We will discard the fantasy, stop the lies, and look at our lives through the lens of truth. We will strive to live our truth daily. No, you don’t have to tell people about your business, explain your past, or answer questions about anything you don’t feel safe to disclose. You can set healthy boundaries and be truthful (which includes the statement “I don’t want to share this information right now”.)


Lies cause distrust and are horrible foundations for relationships. If we can salvage the relationships already proven, let’s do so. But if we can’t, we must move on. By releasing our fantasies, embracing our truth, and honestly expressing our desires to share or not share. This is difficult because we are rewiring our entire existence. But we deserve this, and we can do this.

Love always,

Healing

Dear Wounded Heart,

 

 

Dear Wounded Heart,

Do you a favor and never allow yourself to become a member of the walking dead? As we endure the suffering seasons of life, the pain makes us lose things, and sometimes we lose our will to live. We disguise it as a pattern. But if we pay attention to the pattern, it’s a slow death.

It starts with us waking up and haphazardly making it through the day. A day where we don’t require ourselves to seek excitement, pleasure, joy or anything that causes us to feel beyond the boundaries of our pain. Many of us label it as existing, but we are embracing a slow yet continual death.

We need to recognize that we have survived the sometimes harsh blows of life, which means we are strong. And we need to grab hold of that strength, take one day at a time, look beyond the boundaries of our pain, and seek life again. As we identify the lies that we are feeding ourselves, we can acknowledge there is life beyond pain.

It’s difficult, but all we need to do is convince ourselves that it’s possible. We have a heartbeat, the ability to hope, which is all we need to spark our desire to live. Once we spark the desire, reflect on the days when living was our goal, then the inspiration to live again will remove us from the walking dead to alive. We can do this. All we need to do is start.

 

Love always,

Healing

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